2003-09-17 - 10:24 p.m.

dear diary,

i wonder how x-boss'ss trip went. i should call him up one of these days.

wow, he signed my guestbook again, so nice. i should try harder to make friends with people that have things in common with me but it's still so hard for me. it's not hard to make friends but it's hard to keep them. when i'm upbeat people want to know me and hang out but i do have periods when i just want to be in my room or in my head acessing my current situation.

my leg has been hurting lately. the changes in the weather are making it hard for me to want to go out.

at work, i have been bonding more and more with my boss but we are still worlds apart. he still makes want to be a good person and do good and make good choices. also at work, there's this janitor guy that i want to be friends with because he is nice and well, he is cute, to me he is anyway. he seems to be okay when i speak to him out of nowhere and he sometimes speaks to me without me initiating contact.

i don't want to look for another job. sometimes i do feel trap in my job but it's a nice place to work when there is no drama and everyone just does what i say. cause i do what i want. i'll hold on to my job for awhile longer while i take a few moments to really figure out what i want to do with my not-so-worthless life. perhaps some type of school.

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