2003-01-02 - 8:54 a.m.

dearest diary,

i just realized that i had not spoken about grandfather. he passed away on the first sunday of december. he was buried on the birthday of La Virgen de Guadalupe. we knew was going to die because of his age and his weakend stage. it's expected when someone looks sick...so it was not such a big impact. when someone looks healthy and strong, it is an incredible impact to know that inside they are sick and will be very likely to get sicker. being an adult is not what i expected. i always wondered why adults were so uptight. know i know.

i usually don't cry for good reasons. usually i cry because i'm depressed in my room late at night before going to sleep. but i was leaking tears in the restroom and i could not stop. i may be damaged. i say this because it was the restroom at work. my back hurts, i'll go to bed.

oh, and not so important news, compared to the other stuff...i have not hear from omar or fernando since the beginning of december.

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