1998-10-18 - 11:25 p.m.

dear beloved,

this week i felt really confused, more confused than usual. what about? heritage and sexuality, homosexuality in perticular. gays in mexico are not really respected in movies nor in real life and the role one must take as a homosexual is a hard one to define. in mexico, a gay man is not considered a man and this bothers me. if i am not a man, than what am i? am i even considered human?

to make things more interesting i was acting manic for a few hours. also, i am experiencing memory lapses. i fear that they are connected somehow. and so i don't even remember what i really wanted to write down.

and so i shall be back at another time when i have someting substantial to write about.

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